It’s 2020 and for some people I am about to set women back a few decades.
Don’t worry, it’s not as bad as you think. I’m going to stand in my complete truth, not just my sexual truth but my “me” truth. The lifestyle I want to live is a life most men are not groomed, prepared or ready to live. I am ready and designed to be a submissive wife.
I first have to become a wife. That will happen when it is supposed to happen. I’m not rushing it. I have been married before and due to some personal issues my then husband had, I was cheated out of my wifely duties and ultimately filed for divorce.
To me, being submissive is not old fashion nor is it a bad word. I am ready to be the perfect wife and lover. I know there is no such thing as perfection, but I want to be as close to it as I can in my next marriage.
Being submissive is not about getting abused on any level. It is not giving in to someone who is not capable of handling such a beautiful gift. It is not becoming a slave or not using your voice or having an opinion. It is not about getting used and mistreated. Being submissive should not be a negative experience or lifestyle. This is not about control or power. This is very different from the sexual submission you may have heard about or participated in as a dominant/submissive couple.
Being submissive can be a beautiful experience if done correctly and with mature adults knowing how to handle this type of responsibility. As the one who would be the submissive wife, I have to have total trust in my husband. He needs to be whole and humble enough to receive me submissively.
I want my mate to feel comfortable enough with me that it opens other doors for us to have a solid marriage, and a strong sexual and spiritual connection. A true provider and protector would make being submissive an easy and enjoyable role to be in.
We live in a society where if a woman caters or submits to her man, she’s seen as weak, needy, unable to think for herself and insecure. I am a woman that has earned two college degrees, have been a single parent to two wonderful sons and I am very confident in who I am and everything I do. I do not have “daddy issues” and I feel I have healthy relationships with the men in my life. We have to learn to be comfortable within ourselves and as women, realize we cannot be submissive to anyone. Every man does not deserve our womanly or sexual blessings.
After doing research, I discovered some submissive practices that are simple enough for any wife who wants to take the submissive path.
- See your husband as a hero
- Listen without interruption
- Let him lead and only redirect when necessary. (“When necessary” is key because some of us are used to running things so we give directions easily to everyone, husband included.)
- Always put your husband first
It’s a lifestyle that if you’re not familiar with the role, it will take time and patience from both parties. You do it out of love not because he’s demanding it. A good, caring, loving, and providing husband deserves it.
Some of the benefits of being a submissive wife allows the woman to be a woman and places the husband in a role where he is more responsible for the provision of his wife and family. Your home is more peaceful and there is less chance of a divorce. I look forward to being able to be the woman of the house which includes catering to his needs and keeping our house happy. I no longer want to wear the pants. A pencil skirt and four inch Jimmy Choo designer shoes will be good enough for me. Being submissive takes a good, strong woman to stand down and allow her husband to lead and be the head of household.
Check out a blog by Wife with Purpose. She gives a look at being submissive from a Christian’s perspective. https://wifewithpurpose.wordpress.com/2012/07/16/can-a-black-woman-be-a-submissive-wife/
View the video of Sara Horn on the Today Show discussing her book, My So-Called Life as a Submissive Wife. Sara devoted a year of her life to being submissive to her husband. https://www.today.com/popculture/submissive-wife-author-its-about-selflessness-8C11128809