I was looking on Facebook at a memory from a year ago when the photo of fruit dip popped up. The caption I wrote for the photo stated, “I LOVE this stuff so much if I had a man…whew!”
Was that about my love for fruit dip or turning a full-grown man into a dessert buffet? I can eat the fruit dip without a man. I dip strawberries and sliced apples, even a banana in it all the time. That’s how I know it’s delicious. Or, I can make a man into a human buffet with other foods, chocolate, Cool Whip or juicy oranges just to name a few items. I know because I have done it before. (Shout out to the brothas that have allowed me to turn them into Golden Corral)! It’s about doing something different in the bedroom. This act is what I consider a basic sex task.
Normally I’m the “go-to” person for sex talks. Both men and women feel comfortable confiding in intimate details about their sex lives to me. Remember, I am a firm believer that the conversation of sex needs to be placed on the table regularly. Adults need to express their likes, dislikes and desires. By now you should know the Chocolate Cocaine motto which is Stand in Your Sexual Truth!
What my old Facebook post brought up is wanting to have a conversation about adding some new and yummy acts into your sex life. Some of you may have some experience in this area already but you need a reminder to keep things on the upswing in your love life. I want to make things in your bedroom sizzle! I want YOU to have fun with your mate. Let us not lie, we have all done some freaky ass sex shit that has made toes curl and deep throat sounds rise from your voice which made the walls in your bedroom tremble. Did I bring back some memories? Here’s the nitty gritty about adding some tasty fun to your boudoir.
Rules, rules and more rules. Yes, there are rules to everything including sex. I know you’re wondering what rules would apply to food and sex but here are a few facts to keep you and your lover safe and happy. Now who is ready to try some freaky shit?
· Make sure your lover has no food allergies. The last thing you need is to spread something on your lover that will have them break out and you end up in the emergency room explaining to the doctor how the head of his dick is three times its normal size.
· Be wise about inserting food into private places. Men, please remember women can get yeast infections easily along with other things that make us uncomfortable. Be careful about what you insert into our sweet spots. Ladies be careful about what you put in their sensitive manholes as well.
· Use a variety of food! Try sweet juicy fruit like oranges and watermelon to slowly catch the drips off your lover’s body. Use ice or ice cream for cold intense lovemaking. Ladies pop in a mouthful of peppermint or cinnamon Altoids and put his dick in your mouth and watch him throw his head back in ecstasy. Sushi, whipped cream, caramel, or cotton candy are some other fun treats you can use to bring a different vibe to bed.
This is a time for you and your lover to be creative, let loose and have fun. If you think you’re going to stain and mess up the sheets, then use towels. Or, use Oxyclean when you wash them. it works miracles.
Looking for less mess? Explore other things you can do with food intimately. Try feeding your mate fresh sweet berries, tantalizing chocolate cake, or a sensual cheesy fondue. Bring all five of your senses to the bedroom and be slow and seductive.
Some people are seriously into sex and food. For example, some kink fetishes are, sploshing which is sexual pleasure from sitting on food and W.A.M. is wet and messy food play. If you’re looking for someone to lick fruit dip off your six pack, hit me up. I’m your girl!
“My weaknesses have always been food and men – in that order.” ~ Dolly Parton